literally another aussie in london

literally an aussie in Paris: Louvre

Pronounced Love ree.

Apparently in paris it is one of the things you do.

So I went along.

And oh my god was it fucking boring.

I love art, but how many pictures of rich people posing can you look at?

It bored the shit out of me.

And the worst one is the fucking Mona Lisa.

What a waste of breath.

Firstly you can’t get near the fucker, it’s behind glass, and about a million dickheads taking photos.

But you get a bit of a view from it side on, and it’s nothing special, it wasn’t a magic experience, it was meh, very meh.

There is a cool painting just near the Mona though, it’s of a dude and his entourage, and in it is a dwarf, it may be the most hip hop painting in the louvre.

There is a whole Louvre outside of the paintings section, it’s just that almost no one ever seems to go there.

There is Jesus art everywhere, I think this is because people had no TV back then.

Outside of the main area there are lots of little statues and general knick nacks.

I think I liked the little statues more than the portrait and scenery paintings, but there is so many of them they started to fade away.

The dwarf with snail stuck out though, because it’s a dwarf riding a snail.

Awesome.

While I was in the unpopulated areas, I saw Julie Ann Moore, who was probably more beautiful than most of the art, and like the dwarf riding a snail, very small.

I was alerted to her by the guide, and had to pretend to be looking at some porcelain elephant until I was sure.
I did have two non small thing related high lights in the Louvre.

Napoleon’s Apartments was fucking awesome.

That dude knew how to live.

It was a pimp daddy palace.

The chandeliers were so blingy they hardly needed to be lit.

The chairs were designed to be looked at not sat on.

And the whole place was just cool.

The second main highlight was Mona Lisa Jandals/thongs/flipflops.

All the merchandise is so boring and tasteful, and then to find Mona on thongs is the good news you need as you leave the place.

December 28, 2008 Posted by Jrod | paris | louvre, paris | 7 Comments