John Terry is a bastard
Until a few days ago if someone asked if I knew who John Terry was I would have said, “is he a Tory who got caught shagging cats”. My next guess would have been a footballer.
He is a footballer, and from what I can gather he did something people don’t like.
I am doing my best not to find out and don’t plan on losing any money on partybets.com based on his career.
What really annoys me is that at my tube station people are always going through the exit to get to the platform, so that when you are leaving the station there are always people almost bumping into you as they run for the train you have just got off.
There is entry tunnel right next door, it is no quicker going through the exit tunnel, and you won’t bump into anyone.
But people are fucking useless motherfuckers, and instead of thinking they just run around bumping into people.
How can I hate John Terry and his potential car fucking ways when i have such hardship in my life?
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It’s like tourists who lurk on the left-hand side of escalators. Bastards. Can’t they read?
(I’ve had a soft spot for Terry’s swordsmanship ever since I had to summarise an article about a 17-year-old giving him a blow job in his Bentley. Trying to word it in a way that would be acceptable early morning reading to the entire executive boards of Bentley and VW was quite a challenge. It was almost as much fun as the article about the men who have sex with cars, although the pictures were a bit much in that case – haven’t looked at an exhaust pipe in the same way since.)
As a cricket player/fan you are best away from the John Terry thing. I can guarantee your reaction would be similar to mine, which was “who the fuck cares – what does a football captain do anyway?”
Plenty of people cared about Wayne Carey…
(And Lisa, in most of the world, overtaking on escalators works the same way as on the road – what is London’s problem?)
Great stuff. literallyanothedaussieinlonndon.com is the shit.
Cheers mate.
Going into the ‘entry tunnel’ next door is one of the reasons that John Terry is a scumbag.