literally in edinburgh
I was in Edinburgh last week.
I liked it. Any city that you can walk around even when you are lost without getting tired has a friend in me.
Although it took me a while to get the whole “everything is a bridge” concept.
I went up to the castle, it was ok.
Bought a magic slim wallet.
Went to their wacky parliament building, in which you can just sort of walk around like you own the place, and spent a great deal of time trying to work out exactly what drugs the architect was on.
Enjoyed walking around their hills, that is fun, not alot of fat people in Edinburh, they all have heart attacks i guess.
I went on a ghost tour, cause if i was in Roswell I’d go on an alien tour, more on that later.
I ate lots of seafood. For some reason I never thought of places that cold and seafood went together, but after my 40th oyster i realised cold weather seafood was good.
There was also some haggis eaten, it was ok, not my thing though. I preferred Wannaburger.
And most importantly I learnt how to drink whisky.
You can’t learn how to drink whisky on a whisky tour, although i did that too (and it was a good tour, lots of free whisky), the best way was in some old pub sitting around watching the old guys do it.
House whisky (a cheap blend, the good stuff is too expensive for a weekday), with water in it, and half pint of lager to wash it down with.
I am now a whisky drinker, although I don’t always need the half pint of lager.
You can’t ask for more from a holiday to leave as a beer drinker, and come back as a whisky drinker.
Thank you, Edinburgh.
Taste this, it’s OZtrayan
Australians like watching people eat vegemite.
We know most of you will hate it (although I have convinced a guide that it is great of recent times), but we like to see your face as you eat it.
Once I was in Texas, actually Colorado, but it felt like Texas, and this dickhead was going on and on about how their chilli was too hot for anyone, and then laughed when some of us tried to eat it.
So I got out the Vegemite, and convinced the hillbilly that a spoon full of vegemite is normal, he shut up for a while after that.
But I have moved on from Vegemite now, I have a new ozstryan taste sensation for the English, Bundaberg Rum, or bundy rum as the devotees call it.
It’s lighter fluid.
Undrinkable crap.
But every now and then you see a bar that has it.
The hard part is keeping a straight face while you order it, and a bourbon for yourself and then watching them drink it.
So far I have seen no one drink more than a sip without an expression of repulsion on their face.
When people ask who drinks this, I assure them it’s mostly New Texans (Queenslanders) and bogans (chavs).
That is when they put the drink down.
I can’t fully explain the taste of Bundy rum, but I suggest you find an aussie bar and try a double.
Spirits in cans
Not ghosts, but bourbon, whiskey, vodka etc.
Ghosts should be in cans though, that would be cool.
In Australia we have pre mixed spirits in cans, and you can get them at every bottle-o (off license).
Here their is heaps of beer in cans, and heaps of non mixed spirits in cans, but nothing mixed.
It is an error.
A bottle of bourbon is fine at home, but if you are at the park, they become much harder to handle.
My favourite back home was woodstock, it was sickly sweet, and drinking it gave you a double bizz of sugar and booze.
Recently I had a discussion with a Pom who used to lie in Australia and we both moaned about the lack of pre mixed cans here.
Generally the spirits in a can are not for the upper classes, they frown at the whole idea, but they don’t know what they are missing out on, I knew someone who called it bogan (chav) juice.
When I use to come home from work I would get off the can and help myself to a can of woody, or a 4 pack.
I could drink them on the trip home, or at the bus stop.
So if you are part of a consortium that owns the rights to pre mixed spirits in the UK, but fear the market will not accomodate, put a few cans of woody, cougar or JB around the Ocal tube, and I assure you your sales will please you.
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