literally another aussie in london

Literally in Poland (the Wedding)

We were actually in Poland for a wedding. I would have gone to Poland anyway, but a wedding was even better.  The wedding wasn’t in Gdansk, but in Sopot.

So we popped down there to find we were staying in the same hotel that Hitler had once stayed in.  I could see why, twas a classy place with easy access to a nice beach, Adolf travelled in style.

The wedding ceremony was lopsided as upto 19 people had not come due to the Ash cloud.  It meant that the groom’s side looked rather slim.  My one problem with the service was that it was in Polish and English, I don’t need to hear that I didn’t care about or understand twice. The groom had asked for Jerusalem to be sung, and if you’ve read my book you’ll know I fucken hate that song.  About a few bars in my wife realised that no one was going to sing it, so being the trained singstress she is, she just blurted it out on her own.  In-between choruses she tried to get me to sing it, she really fucked up on that assumption. Although I was proud she stepped up for her countrymen.

When we got back to the hotel it was still early in the afternoon, but the Polish don’t fuck around and have that annoying middle part of the wedding where you have to go about your own business, after some speeches, a weird bread ceremony and a group photo we were at our tables and meeting people.  From here on in it gets a bit blurry.

The table had Vodka in the middle, and I quickly found out that Vodka is a very sociable drink in Poland. Especially at a wedding.

The idea is to drink it as a table, and also to make the bride and groom kiss to sweeten the Vodka.  I like ritual drinking, myself and a Polish dude quickly got hammered. I got way more hammered though, as I was drinking beer in between and struggling with the Polish food.

Another highlight of the night was seeing the 3rd choice best man, a dude from Brissie, try and do a best man’s speech that wouldn’t offend the poles, but would take the piss out of the groom.  He did well with less than 2 hours notice, but one joke about excessive masturbation had to be explained away to the older Poles as something about leaking pipes.

From there I got well and truly plastered. I won some sort of wedding game, wore a nappy on my head, stole orange juice to make screwdrivers, went on a supermarket run pissed out of my mind and then went to bed at about 11 O’Clock fully dressed.

I don’t remember too many details, but I am sure I had a good night.

May 28, 2010 Posted by Jrod | Poland | wedding | 2 Comments